We decided to drive to California and spend Christmas with my family this last year. It was the first time we have been with my parents for Christmas. So as part of their tradition they do a white elephant exchange. Dad got this....and none of us wanted to take it from him. hahahahahaa I love my Dad. We stayed with my sister Becki in her beautiful house in Laguna Nigel. One warm (to us) morning we took the kids for a walk. hahahaha well it was to hot in the 60 degree weather and my poor children were getting heat stroke. Seriously they are little wooses.

So I had the bright idea to take the kids to Hollywood. I though the walk of stars would be fun. I had forgotten how nasty it is there. hahaha But the kids seemed to enjoy it.

Did you know that Godzilla has a star?!!! I guess they don't mean what they use to. hahaha

I have lots more pics to post...just not enough time right now.

Amdrew's back

So my brother Andrew returned from Iraq this week and we were given one day with him. It was so cool to see him again, especially for the kids. Even Benny jumped out of the car and hugged him when we got there. He is doing great. I can't tell you any cool stories though because he couldn't tell us anything. lol Classified. I understand though, so no complaints. There are still guys out there doing a dangerous job and I would never want to do anything to put their missions in jeopardy.

We spent the last part of Sunday on Fort Lewis base. We basically just went to parks and played. It was so much fun.















Andrew is teaching Isaac to me tough...um I don't think Isaac got it.










Welcome home to our favorite hero.

Not here to impress.

Ok, I am just sick of my kids. Sorry I know those are the forbidden words for a Mother to ever utter, but...what ever. Some days I am just tired of the whining, crying and fighting. I get tired of give, give, give and then I get very little back. Ya, it is selfish, but once and I while I need to be. Mother's day just isn't enough. Besides my birthday is the week after Mothers day, so everyone thinks I should be ok with just combining the two. NO WAY!!! I only get two days to be selfish a year and I want TWO SEPARATE days. Is that wrong for me to ask? Honestly is it?
I don't exactly have family I can just drop off my kids and go play. Well I take that back, my Sister-in-law is always willing and I try not to over use her. Still it is expensive to hire a sitter for 4 kids. So I just don't get out. Times like this make me really appreciate my Mother. lol She has six of us little monsters, and I know we weren't easy.
Being a Mom is just one of those things that I don't think we really ever truly can prepare for. I thought I knew how I would be. Patient, playful, attentive, loving, and oh so clean. HAH!!! I may be all of those things once and a while but never all at once. It is difficult not to slap the 4 year old who is crying because the 6 year old touched her. Then the 9 year old is lecturing them both because she knows everything. Meanwhile the 2 year old is up coloring on the wall. Then when I tell someone about the 2 year old coloring on the wall they give me this look like "well that's what happens when you don't watch your kids".

AS IF I CAN BE EVERYWHERE AT ONCE!!!

So my hope is that I never forget. I don't want to be that judgemental woman who looks in disgust at a little kid throwing an absolute fit in the store. I don't want to have the thought of why the Mother can't control the child or why is the child such a brat. Maybe, just maybe the Mother can't control the child cause if she actually disciplines the child in public then there is worse criticism assuming abuse. Yep, being a Mother is hard. We need more than just one day. It should be a celebration every quarter. Yah, that sounds good. Every three months I get a day off. Why....well if nothing else I DIDN'T kill any of them. haha



I say all of this but then I see them doing something so innocent and sweet. Then all of that frustration melts away with love. Funny how that works huh. I know one day they will be all grown and I will miss them. But that is not today. If I get it off my chest then I am actually a better Mom, so I will blog it. lol

What grounds me?

It must be the simple things!! That is what keeps my perspective. The month of March is just ridiculously busy for me. Totally my fault. I have over booked myself by committing to a lot of big things; weddings, events, plays, sewing projects, trips, etc. All of them are things I really want to be a part of, but I didn't consider the time, effort and money that all of these things would take from me. To be honest I am just worn out and none of it has happened yet, just all the preparation. lol

So I have noticed that I am not reading my scriptures or saying my prayers like I use to. I am not giving the proper attention to my children like I should, and I have stopped working out. Hmmmmm now I wonder why I feel empty, tired and frustrated. I was going through some of our family photos and came across this little video of my Benjamin, now 2yrs old. He loves music. I often find him sitting at the piano playing for himself while he sings.



Ok so it gave me perspective. The simple little things like this video remind me of what really keeps me grounded. Small moments like this that make me smile and I forget all the silly things that I think are so much more important. So thanks Benny for reminding Mommy how easy it is to allow "things" to distract me from what I know I need. I need my relationship with my Heavenly Father to be good...I need the relationship with my Husband to be good... I need the realtionship with my children to be good..., and I need to give my self down time so I can be good with myself. :)

How am I gonna see it?

The reason I posted this picture is because it can be good or bad. Some people see the snow as a pesky nuisance that just gets in their way. It causes everyone to slow down in a world where everyone is in a hurry.

Well that's just what I love about it. I see it as a beautiful cover up of the reality below. It causes everyone to slow down and pay attention to what is going on around them. The world seems to become quiet and peaceful. I see a calming excuse to sit around a fire and play with my kids.

Lately I have been just so weighted down with people who need. People I truly love and feel their pain. I am burdened with the anguish of not being able to really help them and I find myself often on my knees about them. The frustration of not knowing the big picture and having so many unanswered questions to why things do or do not happen.

I guess it is like the snow. Ya, it is cold and miserable when I sit in it and dwell over the many people who drive so slow. Not to mention the dirty mud mixed into it all. And if I am out in it too long, I freeze my butt off. But really it isn't so bad when my babies are all puffed up in snow close laughing and playing. And if I go inside and look at it from an different perspective it all changes. Sitting by the warm fire looking out the window it is beautiful. I guess perspective is important. How we choose to look at things makes all the difference. I don't have all the answers. THANK HEAVENS! Man, I would never be let alone if I did. lol Sometimes searching for the answers is what causes the greatest strength in each of us.
Just how I am feeling to day.

Curious Benny

So I came down stairs to a minty fresh smell and noticed the gum packet on the counter.






Next to it was a pile of wrappers......










Next to that was a pile of gum.







Why he didn't eat it you ask? Honestly I don't know, but I am glad he didn't. Can you imagine the mess he would have made when he spit it out. hahahaha

I like it now.

Ok, so my expression is weird but I wanted to show myself that the hard work is paying off. I have gone from a size 14 to a size 10 since last October. It is a slow steady process that I have been taking. I have changed from eating processed foods and replaced them with more home made items. It takes time but it is worth it. I started with getting rid of a few things in my house. It seems extreme but I threw out the things with High fructose corn syrup, MSG, and any type of Hydrogenated oils. It is surprising how many things have those three ingredients in them. It is also amazing how many easy replacements there are. I am not perfect at it, I still have a few things like fruit sancks and such. I have also really made the effort to make better choices when I eat out. I am finding that my kids and I are liking the healthy choices better then the alturnatives now. They like veggies grilled on the BBQ, and they eat whole wheat bread no problem. Mainly cause it is the only choice. :) We still get cookies and french fries, just not as often.

My point in this post is to remind myself that If I set small realistic goals then I can follow them. I will step it up to the next level soon. That is buying more Organic, but I just can't afford it now. :)

Let's not forget the exersize. I am so lazy. I get board working out to videos. But loosing the inital first 10 lbs was very motivating. I have a few different videos to choose from. They range in different difficulty. I simply pick the one that fits my mood. Which is often lazy lol, but I really try to do something at least 3 days in the week. I hear that 3 days helps maintane and 5 days help you loose. I am loosing though because I have done nothing for so long. :) Pretty soon I will stop loosing and I will have to do more diffucult workouts and more often.

The best part is that now I really like to exercise. I feel better, I get more done in the day, I am more patient with my kids, and I am more turned on for Bryan. (I know gross to you, but it matters for a health marriage.)

So this is my note to self. Healthy eating and regular exercise actally makes me a better person. You know... this is the word of wisdom. People think we Mormons are so crazy for what we believe. Well, I have found the perfect weight loss program. It was givin hundreds of years ago by a Prophet named Joseph Smith. To be honest for those of you who are not members of my faith....I am not preaching... I am stating the facts. :)

So get up and go do something. Even if it is only 10 min a day. You may not get big results but at least you are getting started.